The residents of the Institute reaffirm at the end of morning meditations the intention we have embraced for our spiritual growth while living in community. We chose a phrase from the end of that affirmation as our focal practice for November: “to be caring, useful and supportive members of the community.” I think this intention applies to anyone who interacts regularly with their family, co-workers or friends, and it can be a profound way of growing more conscious of our interconnection with each other and our ability to contribute in positive ways to our world.
These three words—caring, useful and supportive—guide us to approach our interactions with an open heart, and to think of the well-being of others and the needs of the group as a whole. We express sincere caring by wishing for others to be well and happy, by appreciating their strengths and virtues and ignoring their shortcomings, by forgiving their mistakes, and by making time to listen and understand them.
When we observe behavior in someone that causes harm to anyone, this intention guides us to mindfully offer feedback in a way that clearly expresses care. This means finding the right time to speak to someone, humbly expressing our feelings and observations without judgement or conjecture, and being willing to hear their point of view. Such conversations can be difficult, but if our words are backed by humility and sincerity, we can grow closer with someone as we share the challenges of spiritual growth.
Being a useful member of a community can be understood simply as actively seeking to contribute to the values and efforts of whatever group we are part of. In addition to our own projects and duties, we make time to serve the needs of our families or co-workers. Here at the Institute, we share certain duties like keeping the Institute clean and doing the dishes together after a meal. We are useful when we share the teachings, pray for peace, give others a chance to shine, or cheerfully pick up after someone who left in a hurry.
Ultimately, being caring, useful and supportive represents a shift from me-centered to we-centered thinking—and toward the realization that loving others is loving yourself. My teacher, Sri Swami Satchidananda, beautifully articulates this essential truth when he says, “Real love is possible only when you see everything as your own expression. All others are none other than you; they just appear to be different. We always need to go beyond the name and form. When we rise above the worldly limitations, we will find that the essence is the same.”
Hope this is helpful.
Sending it with much love and gratitude,
Ramananda
